


What a Bunch of Losers

by benjaminrussell



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), The Losers (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Guardians of the Galaxy, M/M, The Losers as the Guardians of the Galaxy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 09:32:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14767038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/benjaminrussell/pseuds/benjaminrussell
Summary: Jake Jensen, space adventurer and former Ravager, is having a great day. Right up until he gets arrested, falls in with a group of ragtag criminals, and finds himself in a race to save the galaxy from a rogue Kree army led by the mysterious Max.





	What a Bunch of Losers

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by watching The Losers and Guardians of the Galaxy in short succession, and realising how many of the actors are in both The Losers and the MCU. Some of the characters were easier to merge than others, haha!

Jake’s day had started out great. He’d woken up to his favourite song playing on the tape deck, the coffee machine had finally started working again, and then most importantly, his theft of the orb had gone off without a hitch. Or well, admittedly those goons under orders from the mysterious ‘Max’ had turned up and tried to stop him, but a bit of fighting and a bit of banter were nothing he couldn’t handle.

(“Who are you?”

“Jake Jensen.”

“…”

“Wait, I have another name you might know me as. …Captain America.”)

It hadn’t lasted though. He’d gone to the meeting with the Broker, they’d been going through the usual back and forth, and then he had accidentally dropped the name ‘Max’ into the conversation. The Broker had immediately clammed up, refused to have anything to do with Jake or the orb (which he still didn’t know what it was), and kicked him out of his shop, leaving Jake wondering how it had suddenly gone so wrong. Who the hell was this Max guy?

He shoved the sphere back in his bag, straightened his jacket and turned to see a super hot, green skinned woman watching him.

“Is everything okay?” She asked, and that was all Jake needed to launch into a rant about the Broker.

“He just backed out of our deal! Who does that? We had an agreement, and I upheld my end of it, but what does he go and do? Decide he doesn’t actually want the thing and refuse to pay me!” He took a breath, about to continue complaining, but the woman had apparently had enough of listening to him because she flung her hand out and gave a sharp jab to his throat, leaving him coughing and spluttering, and then she grabbed his bag and ran off. Of course, she just wanted the orb. As soon as he could breathe again, Jake grabbed his gun from its holster and sprinted after her. He might not know what the orb was, but he knew it was worth something, and if nothing else, he couldn’t let this mystery woman just steal his stuff.

“Hey, that’s mine!” He yelled, not that it did any good, and chased after her until he got a clear shot between the civilians wandering around. He pulled the trigger and let loose a blast of energy, hitting her square in the back and knocking her to the ground. Ha! He hurriedly closed the distance between them, snatched up his bag, and kept running, figuring that getting back to his ship and getting off planet was the best course of action right now. She could clearly handle herself in a fight, and funnily enough, Jake didn’t want to draw the attention of the Nova Corp down on himself right now. If he could just get out of the plaza, he was sure he could lose the woman (he had no doubts that the blast wouldn’t keep her down for long) but when he was only ten or so metres from his goal, two men stepped out from the alley he’d been aiming for, guns drawn. They definitely weren’t Nova Corp, given their outfits and weaponry, but they held themselves like soldiers and looked like they meant business. Bounty hunters then. Shit. He threw himself to the ground sideways to avoid the shots from their guns and used the momentum to roll and jump back to his feet, taking off in a different direction almost before he found his footing again. Luckily that was when the mystery women entered the fray once more, drawing the fire of the heavily tattooed bounty hunter, leaving just the human looking one to chase after Jake. Or at least that’s what he thought as he darted through the crowds, wound his way around the large fountain, and made another break for one of the streets branching off the plaza, right up until he caught a flash of reflected sunlight that was shortly followed by the bright blast of an energy rifle. He just had time to think, “Shit, sniper!” before the shot hit him and he found himself on the ground again, flailing as the electricity coursed through his body.

Jake possibly lost a moment or two then, because the bounty hunter chasing him was suddenly stood over him grinning, with his gun trained on Jake’s head. He could still hear faint sounds of fighting in the background, presumably the mystery woman and the tattooed guy, so he used the opportunity to get his breath back and think of a plan to get out of here. He had no doubt that the bounty hunter would shoot him if he moved, but if he could just distract him… Inching his hand slowly towards his belt, he struck up conversation in an attempt to hide what he was doing.

“Hey, so what do you say to just letting me go?”

“Yeeaah, no. I think we’d rather just collect the bounty, seeing as we’ve gone to the trouble of catching you and all,” The guy replied, still smiling, seemingly amused by Jake’s question.

“How about a trade?” Jake offered, not that he planned on going through with it, “My freedom for my loot?” His belt and the several little toys on it were now almost in reach, so if he could just keep the guy distracted for a few seconds longer, he might stand a chance.

“Let me think… Nah. Still no,” The bounty hunter said, gaze flickering away from Jake for a millisecond and giving Jake what he thought was his chance. His fingers skimmed the edge of his taser, but before he could grab it, his hand was knocked away by something cold and metallic. He looked down, immediately spotted that it was a rifle, and then let his gaze follow the barrel of the gun up to the man holding it. Clearly Krylorian given his dusky pink skin, he had dark brown shoulder length hair and was wearing what was possibly the first cowboy hat Jake had seen since he’d been taken from Earth as a kid. He was also the most beautiful person Jake had ever met, which was saying something as he’d travelled all the way across the galaxy.

“Hey there,” He said eloquently, “I’m Jake.” Smooth. The guy snorted but did actually reply so Jake counted it as a win, “Cougar.” Before Jake could say anything else embarrassing, the three of them were suddenly surrounded by golden light and being lifted off their feet.

“Drop your weapons!” The voice of a Nova Corp soldier called out, voice amplified by the speaker of their ship, and as three guns hit the ground in quick succession, Jake chanced a look over his shoulder, spotting the woman and the other bounty hunter also caught up in the traction field. Resigning himself to the situation, he gave in to the song that was now stuck in his head and started singing softly under his breath.

_“Pink it was love at first sight,_  
_Yeah, pink when I turn out the light,_  
_And pink gets me high as a kite,_  
_And I think everything is going to be all right,_  
_No matter what we do tonight.”_

***

“We arrested these five on Xandar. Check out their rap sheets,” Rhomann Dey reported as one by one the assorted criminals were paraded in front of him and the other few officers in the room, including Denarian Saal.

“Aisha al-Fadhil. Surgically modified and trained as a living weapon. The daughter of the recently deceased galactic drug dealer, Ahmed Fadhil, who we suspect was working with the part of Kree army that broke the accords.”

“Franklin Clay. Former Nova Corp Colonel turned bounty hunter. He and his team went rogue and massacred Fadhil’s entire compound, including a ship full of children.”

“Linwood Porteous, aka ‘Pooch’. A Xandarian native, he’s Clay’s transport and heavy weapons specialist.”

“Carlos Alvarez, aka ‘Cougar’. Clay’s sniper. He hasn’t said a word since we brought him in, but he punched the guard who tried to take his hat.”

“Jacob Jensen, from Terra. Raised from youth by a band of mercenaries called the Ravagers, led by Yondu Udonta.”

“What a bunch of losers,” Saal said derisively, before passing judgement and sending them all to the Kyln.

***

As soon as they’d all been processed and shoved into the prison proper, Jake felt eyes on him. Not as many as were staring with undisguised hatred at Aisha, but still enough to make him feel decidedly uncomfortable. He didn’t know why Aisha was sticking with them, but he suspected that she and Clay had made some sort of deal, given the way they were now looking at each other. A hand clamped down hard on Jake’s shoulder and he whirled around, but before he could do anything else, Clay had punched the owner of the hand in the face. The guy staggered backwards, clutching his nose, and then Cougar stepped forward and in quick succession, swept the guy’s feet out from under him and followed it up with a sharp kick to the temple, leaving him bleeding and unconscious on the floor.

“Anyone who wants him has got to come through us!” Pooch shouted at the surrounding criminals, “And by that, I mean we’ll go through you!”

“Yeah, I’m with them!” Jake added, quickly following after their departing backs in case anyone decided to try anything, despite that display of violence. He could take care of himself in a fight, but even so, he didn’t fancy getting mobbed by a bunch of thugs.

They set up camp at a small table at the edge of the room, the five of them arrayed around the table in varying states of alertness. Jake himself was rather on edge and couldn’t stop fidgeting, but at the other end of the scale there was Cougar who was leant back against the wall, looking for all intents and purposes like he was asleep, although Jake was close enough to just about make out the faint glimmer of his eyes beneath his lowered lashes. Then a man with dreads and golden eyes sat down with them, and while Aisha looked about as close to leaping to her feet as Jake was, the three bounty hunters didn’t look surprised. Clay was even smiling, and that in itself was kind of freaky.

“Roque,” He said, extending his hand to the new guy, “Thought we weren’t going to see you again.”

“Things didn’t work out quite as expected,” Roque replied, giving Clay’s hand a firm shake, “Now you’re here though, I’ve a chance of getting out of here and back home before it’s too late.” Seeing as Roque was apparently an old friend of Clay’s or something, Jake relaxed (comparatively) and started looking around at their surroundings, focusing on the security measures.

“I think I know how,” He said after a few minutes, glancing around the table to gauge the others’ reactions. He spotted Roque looking at him intently, and so repressed a shiver (there was just something weird about him, some vibe that everything wasn’t as it seemed) and turned his attention to Cougar instead.

“Go on,” Clay said, earning himself a point in Jake’s book for being willing to listen to his team (or in this case his sort of prisoner).

“If we want to get out of here, we need to get into that watchtower,” Jake replied, tilting his head backwards and to the right slightly, “And to do that I’ll need a couple of things. The guards use security bands to get in and out. I need one.”

“Leave that to me,” Aisha stated.

“See that black panel on the wall below the observation deck? Behind it there’s a battery. A purplish box with green wires. I definitely need that too,” Jake continued.

“How are we meant to get that? It’s at least 20ft up and there’s guards everywhere. There’s no way of getting it without being seen,” Aisha demanded.

“Cougar can get it, with a little help from Roque,” Pooch said confidently, but didn’t bother to explain how, before asking, “When should we do it?”

“The important thing,” Jake quickly added, “Is that as soon as the battery is removed, everything’s going to slam into emergency mode. Once we have that, we’ve got to move quickly, so I recommend getting that last.”

Pooch and Cougar both looked to Clay then, drawing Jake’s attention in that direction too. Aisha shrugged as if to say, “Not my decision,” and finally Roque in his low baritone said, “Your call, Clay.” Before Clay had a chance to decide though, a fight broke out near the food dispensing station, immediately sparking other violence and sending the whole room into chaos.

“We go now!” Clay shouted over the sudden outburst of noise, “Aisha, get the armband; Roque and Cougar, get the battery; Jensen, be ready to do what you need to do; and Pooch you’re with me keeping this lot away from Jensen so he can do his thing.” Aisha darted off one way, instantly vanishing into the crowd, while Cougar and Roque went straight for the observation tower. Jake watched the two of them, curious as to how they were planning on getting to the battery because even if one of them stood on the other’s shoulders they wouldn’t be close to reaching it. He didn’t have to wait long to find out though. Roque hurried ahead and dropped into a crouch when he was a couple of metres from the tower, facing back the way he’d came. Cougar then broke into a run, getting up a bit of speed before he placed one foot on Roque’s laced fingers, and as he used his momentum to push himself off the floor, Roque gave him an additional boost by throwing his hands up and flinging the other man at the wall behind with a strength that was beyond Human or Xandarian. Cougar almost seemed like he was flying, before he grabbed an exposed pipe and used it to pull himself up the small distance left. He made short work of the battery housing, and soon was tearing the battery itself off the wall, sliding down the wall with insane parkour skills to pull the battery free of the wiring. As soon as the wires gave way, the room darkened and sirens started blaring and flashing, but it was only seconds before the two men were barrelling back towards the table that was their temporary base of operations. Jake belatedly realised he was gaping in astonishment and awe, and quickly shut his mouth with a distinct click of teeth, hopefully before anyone noticed. If he hadn’t already had a crush on Cougar, he definitely did now.

“Why didn’t you say you were secretly a spider?” Jake demanded as Cougar slid onto the bench next to Jake and carefully deposited the battery down in front of him.

“Spider?” Cougar asked, cocking his head slightly.

“A creature from Earth that can climb walls,” Jake explained. Their conversation was cut short there though, by both Aisha slamming the security band down in front of him and by bursts of gunfire breaking out all around them. Cougar darted to his feet again, and Jake quickly set to his task, combining the two objects in a way that they really weren’t designed to be to give him the control he needed to enact his plan. He tuned out the sounds of fighting, aside from a single glance over his shoulder to see Aisha, Roque, and the three bounty hunters all fighting guards and other prisoners alike and set to work. He knew he didn’t have long, but luckily wiring the battery up to the band took less time than he’d feared, and he was soon tearing his way across the prison, the others racing behind him.

“To the watchtower!”

One mad dash and a bumpy ride in a room that certainly wasn’t meant to be piloted later, the six of them spilled out of the newly relocated observation desk and into the storage room, immediately beelining for their stuff. Jake pulled on his clothes, glad to be out of that awful prison uniform already and did a quick inventory. The sphere was still in his bag thankfully, but his Walkman was missing, and that really wasn’t on. That dick of a guard must have kept it.

“I’ll meet you at the Milano, the blue and orange M-ship,” Jake told the others, before shoving his bag at Aisha (after switching out the orb) and darting out of the room. He heard various shouts of disbelief, but kept running, dodging the occasional prisoner or guard, until he reached the guard room and sure enough, there was his Walkman. He scooped it up and clipped it back to its rightful place on his belt, before turning on his heel ready to make his escape. Just before he left the room, he spotted a familiar looking hat hanging on the coat stand, and figuring Cougar would probably appreciate it back, he grabbed it and ran. He hurried back through the prison, narrowly making it to an airlock and freedom, activating his helmet just before he launched himself out into space. Coming up to the cockpit windscreen of the Milano from the outside and seeing the looks on everyone’s faces was great, but what was even better was Cougar’s expression when Jake produced his hat from where he’d stashed it safely under his jacket. He caught the look Pooch and Clay shared out of the corner of his eye but didn’t have any context in which to understand the significance, so he happily just concentrated on the warmth emanating from Cougar’s small but pleased smile, and the loop the loops that it was making his stomach do.

***

In line with what now seemed to be par for the course, the meeting with Aisha’s buyer went south, although this time it surprisingly wasn’t anything to do with them. Just the small matter of the guy’s assistant deciding she’d rather die than serve him anymore, grabbing the stone that was contained in the orb before anyone could stop her (or help her), and destroying herself and most of the building in the process. Luckily the Collector had given them the information about Max’s whereabouts before explaining what the orb truly was (and the subsequent explosion), so they decided retreat was the better part of valour and legged it, taking the orb with them as they clearly couldn’t let Max get his hands on it. Now they were docked in some out of the way space port, debating their next move.

“I know this is a bit late in the game to be asking,” Jake interrupted Clay and Aisha’s discussion of tactics, “But I figure it might be kinda important if we’re about to go wage war on him. Who actually is this Max guy?”

“He’s the leader of the rogue Kree army that’s trying to wipe out the Nova Empire, but no-one knows his true identity,” Roque explained, turning his unsettling gaze from where he’d been sharpening his deadly looking sword to Jake.

“He framed us for the Titan massacre,” Pooch added, expression hardening, “He’s the reason we’re on the run and why I can’t see my wife.”

“You were there?” Aisha asked, looking intently between Pooch and Clay. Like Jake she’d quickly learnt not to expect Cougar to speak more than the occasional odd word, but unlike Jake she hadn’t taken it as a challenge to try and get him to talk, instead just directing her attention primarily at Clay. Clay nodded in response to her question and began to give a brief explanation of the events that had led the three of them to being kicked out of the Nova Corp and branded as traitors.

“Our mission was to confirm the coordinates of Fadhil’s base for an orbital strike, but we saw there were kids in there, so we tried to call it off. Instead of the Denarian, we got Max on the comms who warned us we’d just made a big mistake. We couldn’t just let those kids be killed though, so we went in. We rescued them all just before the strike hit and put them on our ship to get them to safety, but as soon as it took off it was destroyed by another orbital strike. It was meant to be us.”

“Did you see Fadhil?” Aisha demanded, a mixture of sadness and cold fury warring across her face, “Did you kill him?” Clay nodded again.

“He found out Max’s plan and was going to stop him,” She said, eyes welling up despite clearly fighting the tears. Clay replied softly as the others all held their breath, “He was a bad man, Aisha. He hurt a lot of people.”

“I know. It doesn’t matter!” Aisha all but cried, looking like she wanted to murder Clay where he sat. Instead she abruptly stood up and stalked off, giving them no indication whether she was planning on coming back or not. There was a few minutes silence while they all processed what had just happened, before the quiet got too much for Jake and he blurted out, “So what now?”

“We go after Max anyway,” Clay stated, “We need to make our move before he moves on and we lose him again.” He then sighed, looked around at the rest of them, and added, “It will be dangerous, and it might be a suicide mission, but this is our best chance to take him down. Go and get some rest and meet back at the ship at six hundred hours.”

***

They regroup the next morning, wide awake and heavily armed, but they’re noticeably missing someone. Roque is gone, and when Clay turns up and announces they’re ready to depart, it’s obvious he’s not expecting anyone else to be joining them. Pooch grumbled about it under his breath as they get ready to take off, presumably not meaning for Clay to hear, although Jake could tell their leader did. Clay’s expression tightened but he didn’t say anything until they were safely out of the port, Jake once again willingly relinquishing the pilot’s chair to Pooch.

“Roque’s an old friend,” Clay stated, staring out into space instead of looking at the rest of them, “So trust me when I say he’s not a coward or a traitor.”

“Why isn’t he here then?” Jake asked, voicing the question that he guessed the other two were unwilling to ask. Clay stayed quiet for a few moments, clearly debating whether to tell them or not, before explaining quietly, “He got word that his people were in danger. He’s gone to help them.”

“Oh. Well I guess that’s okay, even if it is the worst possible timing,” Jake commented, fiddling with the inner workings of the latest gadget he’d picked up from a backwater market that he’d already forgotten the name of, more to occupy his fingers than for any real need to take it apart. Apparently Roque was one of those people who got more and more mysterious the more you found out about them, but Jake wasn’t going to settle for the little information that Clay had seemed fit to tell them – he was too curious for that.

“Who are his people? I can tell he’s definitely not from round here. And how do you know him?” Jake asked, only breaking off from asking questions when Cougar nudged him with his knee and hissed, “Silencio.” Jake was caught off guard by the sheer novelty of Cougar both touching him and speaking, so he actually shut up in time to hear Clay’s exasperated words, “You can ask him yourself if you meet him again.”

***

Pooch landed the Milano on the far side of Xandar’s second moon, a short way out from where the Collector’s information said Max was currently holed up in the middle of an old warehouse complex, preparing to launch a devastating attack on Xandar itself. Even though it was only just approaching midday from their point of view, it was dark on this side of the moon which was just how they’d planned it as it should be easier to break in under cover of darkness. Clay, Jake and Cougar quietly disembarked the ship, leaving Pooch to stand guard and monitor the ship’s scanners, and quietly made their way to the perimeter of the complex. It took a lot of effort for Jake to not keep up a running commentary, but he knew that their only chance to pull this off was to keep the element of surprise on their side so he forced himself to keep quiet, talking to the mental version of Cougar in his head instead. They got into the complex without too much trouble, but they knew that once they got further in the security would be a lot tighter, with Max’s own troops as well as the complex guards, which was why the first order of business was to get Jake somewhere he could disable the electronic security systems. Clay headed one way while Jake went the other, Cougar following so silently behind that Jake kept getting the urge to look over his shoulder to check the other man was still following him. They crept through the maze of warehouses, using the cover of darkness to sneak past the guards without engaging them. Max’s people were another matter, but these guards who just had the misfortune to work at a place a criminal had picked for one of his bases, they didn’t want to hurt if they could avoid it. Once they got closer to the centre, Cougar scaled the side of a building and then continued following Jake from the rooftops, up until they reached the warehouse that they’d identified as being the hub of Max’s security. Jake immediately started hacking the electronic lock, confident Cougar was watching his back through the scope of his rifle, and mouthed the words to one of the songs from his mixtape as he worked. He would have brought his cassette player but Clay had told him off for it, saying that it was ‘unprofessional’, as if Jake was actually one of his (ex) soldiers instead of a target turned ally, so Jake was reduced to providing his own soundtrack. He’d almost gotten through the lock when over the comms Cougar muttered, “Guards.” Jake renewed his efforts, but unfortunately it was complicated enough that he didn’t quite get through before the guards spotted him. They looked like low level goons, which was backed up by the fact that while all three drew their guns on him immediately, none of them thought to let their colleagues know that there were intruders. Jake slowly raised his hands and turned towards them, deciding in a split second to have a bit of fun on this otherwise very Serious and Important mission.

“I’m warning you,” He announced in a low voice, lowering his hands and making them into ‘guns’ to point at the guards, “I’m a lethal killing machine.” There was an almost inaudible snort in his ear, making him ridiculously happy at the idea that Cougar found his performance funny too.

“There was a secret government experiment that did stuff to me. Spooky stuff,” He continued, pausing briefly to consider before deciding ‘fuck it’ and to go all in, “Anal stuff. Turned me into a dangerous telekinetic. As the ancient Tibetan philosophy states…” He noticed the guards frowning in confusion at that, because of course here in space apparently telekinesis was feasible but mention of an Earth country was strange, but he barrelled on, continuing with his story until Cougar had chance to adjust his position to take them out.

“…don’t start none, won’t be none.” There was silence for a few moments as Jake and the three guards stared at each other, until one of them holstered his gun and reached for a pair of handcuffs, saying drily, “Telekinetic your way out of this.” In a moment of absolutely perfect timing, Cougar then made a noise to indicate he had the shot, so Jake mimed firing a gun and the guard holding the cuffs went down with a shot to the chest. He aimed at the guard to the left and repeated the process, before pointing both ‘guns’ at the lead guard, gleefully spotting the apprehension in the man’s eyes.

“Face down, or I make your heart stop beating with my mind,” Jake threatened, almost bursting into laughter as the guard actually did as he was told.

“Thank you, Cougar,” He murmured as he leant down and tased the man so he wouldn’t get up and warn the others as soon as Jake turned his back, before he then quickly finished hacking the lock and slipped inside.

***

It wasn’t long after Jake’s spectacular performance that everything went to shit. He’d gotten the rest of the way into the warehouse with no issues, had hit barely even a hiccup in the hacking of the server controlling the security systems, and was done right on schedule. He hurried to the other end of the warehouse and slipped out of the door, only to come face to face with a group of Max’s guys who looked a lot meaner and harder to escape from than the previous bunch, each of whom had a gun trained directly on Jake.

“Shit,” He muttered, before raising his voice a little and greeting them with false cheer, “Hey, how’s it going?” The closest guy grabbed Jake roughly and handcuffed him, taking Jake’s pistols but stupidly leaving all of his toys, before they forced him to walk, leading him towards the centre of the complex. Jake was all prepared to keep up a steady stream of chatter to annoy them and to hopefully cause them to let down their guard, but as soon as he started speaking again one of them jabbed him with the muzzle of their gun and demanded that he shut up. The ensuing not quite silence meant Jake could hear in perfect clarity the sounds of what had to be his new friends being surprised and captured too. From the sounds of the muttered cursing, he’d guess Cougar and Pooch, although he couldn’t hear Clay so hopefully that meant he was still free. The men lead Jake into an open space that was mostly empty except for a couple of trucks and a small space craft, and forced him to his knees near the wall of one of the surrounding warehouses, just as another group of thugs led Cougar out of another alleyway. They shoved him to the ground near Jake and then formed a loose circle around the two of them, guns pointed at Jake and Cougar from every direction. Without a distraction, if they made a move they’d be dead before they could even get to their feet.

A few minutes later, Pooch was marched into the open area too, shortly followed by an even larger group of men leading Clay from the other side of the space. So much for the hope that their leader was still free. Pooch was brought over to join Jake and Cougar, while Clay was taken to one of the trucks, struggling against his captors when he caught sight of the other three.

“It was a trap from the start!” He shouted just before he was forced into the vehicle, “Max spread the info on purpose!” That answered the question of how they’d all been discovered so quickly, and while things were looking pretty damn bleak, Jake was at least glad that it hadn’t been because Aisha or Roque had sold them out. As the truck counting Clay drove off, one of the guards ordered Pooch to kneel next to Cougar, and when he refused, shot him in both of his legs without warning. Pooch collapsed to the ground like his strings had been cut, barely managing to stop himself hitting the floor face first. Jake wanted to scramble over to him and see if he could do anything to help, but he was well aware of all the guns pointed at them and while their chance of escaping was getting lower and lower, they certainly wouldn’t manage it if Jake got himself shot as well. The lead guard turned his attention to Cougar, commenting, “That’s a nice hat,” as he reached for the item in question. Cougar ducked his head to the side, avoiding the man’s reach, and muttered, “No-one touches the hat.” As he attempted to avoid the guard’s second grab he was brought up short by the man jabbing his pistol against Cougar’s head, causing Jake’s heart to leap into his throat.

“I really don’t care if it’s got a hole in it,” The guard warned, glowering at Cougar. Jake was about to say something like ‘let him have the damn hat, Cougs’ but that was when the corners of Cougar’s mouth quirked up in a wide grin. Jake followed Cougar’s line of sight and started grinning too – Aisha was stood on top of one of the shipping containers on the other side of the open space with an absolutely ginormous gun in her hands, looking like she meant business.

“What are you smiling about?” The guard demanded. Cougar nodded in Aisha’s direction, and then as the man turned to look, Aisha fired her big fuck off gun at a nearby container, causing whatever it was that was in there to explode and creating one hell of a distraction. Jake, Cougar, and even Pooch took advantage of the confusion to grab weapons off the guards and fight back, causing even more chaos. Fighting with his hands cuffed together definitely made things more interesting, so at the first chance he got, Jake jammed the cuffs against a handy little device on his belt that short circuited small electronic items, causing them to spring open. With the hand not holding the liberated gun, he pulled the cuffs off and flung them into the face of a guard that was advancing on Pooch, before activating his wrist mounted holo-shield and diving properly into the fray.

Once they’d fought their way out of the open area, wrapped Pooch’s wounds tightly enough so he could hobble, and regrouped with Aisha, the four of them set their minds to finding Clay and Max. Luckily despite the maze of shipping containers and warehouses that they were in, it was relatively easy to do so as Max wasn’t hiding – they found him stood outside the heavily defended central command building, giving a speech about power or some other rubbish to Clay who was armed once more but also completely surrounded. The purple stone that had been inside the orb and hidden in Clay’s jacket was now mounted on a gauntlet on Max’s left hand, glowing deceptively gently.

“I’ve got an idea,” Jake told the others as they watched Max pace from their hiding place, “But I’ll need a distraction.” He didn’t mention that it was quite probably a suicide mission, but from all he’d seen and heard in the past few days, Max needed to be taken out no matter what.

“Give me thirty seconds to get into position, and then gimme that distraction,” He continued, glancing from Aisha to Pooch to Cougar, who he let his gaze linger on and who nodded in acknowledgment. Jake slung the gun over his shoulder and darted off, hurrying around the perimeter of a building so he could approach from behind Max. He slowed to a halt in the shadows of the building so he could watch what was happening but so hopefully none of Max’s guys would spot him, and looked out of the alleyway just in time to see Cougar take a shot at Max. It was the perfect shot, impacting directly on Max’s temple, but instead of killing him the energy just dissipated. Fuck. Jake knew he wasn’t going to get a better distraction, so he shook off the shock and launched himself forward, using the thrusters on his boots to give him extra speed. Just as Max raised his hand, no doubt to use the power of the stone in retaliation, Jake reached him, using his momentum to yank the stone from the gauntlet and kick Max in the face for good measure. He landed in the middle of the open space near Clay, stumbling as his feet hit the ground because the power emanating from the stone was already coursing through his system, spreading agony in its wake. Through the pain he had a vague impression of Max trying to take back the stone, but it reacted to Jake’s will and didn’t let the man close. Jake could feel what he could only describe as his body beginning to be pulled apart and he couldn’t help but cry out in pain, but just before he thought that he would explode like Karina, there was a grounding hand on his shoulder and the pain lessened just a bit. He managed to glance to the side and saw Clay gritting his teeth as the power and pain flowed through him too. Then he felt someone take his free hand, lessening the pain enough so he could turn his head and meet Cougar’s steady gaze, giving him a smile that was probably more of a grimace, before the pain dropped another notch as Aisha grasped Cougar’s bicep. Jake was able to form thoughts again so he focused on trying to contain the power of the stone, channeling the strength of their combined wills. He wasn’t sure whether it was having any effect until Pooch approached from in front of him and clapped his right hand on Jake’s other shoulder, holding out his left which was cupping the open orb. Jake didn’t know where he’d found it, but he didn’t care because with all five of them now connected and sharing the pain he was able to control the stone enough to raise his hand and press the stone back into the orb, slamming it quickly closed. They all sagged in relief and let go of each other, Jake looking around to see that the Nova Corp had arrived and taken the rest of Max’s guys into custody while he’d been unaware of his surroundings. There wasn’t any sign of Max himself though.

“Where’s Max?” He asked with a frown. Surely they hadn’t gone through all that just for Max to escape?

“The power of the stone disintegrated him,” Clay replied, looking happier and more relaxed than Jake had ever seen him, and Jake couldn’t blame him. At the news that Max was gone for good, the relief mixed with the adrenaline from handling the unbridled power of the stone, spurring Jake to turn to Cougar and kiss him deeply, feeding all his emotions into the kiss. It wasn’t how Jake had been planning on confessing his feelings for the other man, but Cougar was kissing him back just as passionately so he counted it as a success.

***

Afterwards, when the Nova Corp had cleared up the scene and arrested any of Max’s guys who were still alive, and had escorted Jake and his friends back to Xandar for a debriefing, Jake and Aisha were brought to see Nova Prime Rael while Clay and Cougar accompanied Pooch to the medical wing to get his wounds seen to.

“Why would you even know this?” Jake asked incredulously, staring at the screen showing the results of his body scan.

“When we arrested you, we noticed an irregularity in your nervous system,” Dey explained, “So we had it checked out.”

“So I’m not Terran?” Jake queried, even though he was pretty sure that wasn’t actually what they were saying.

“You are Terran, but your DNA has been genetically altered with this ‘super soldier serum’ to give you enhanced physical abilities above and beyond those normally possessed by your race,” Nova Prime replied, “And given how integrated the changes are, the serum had to have been administered at a very early stage of development or pre-conception.”

“That could be why you were able to hold the stone for as long as you did,” Aisha suggested, looking at Jake with such speculative curiosity that it made him feel decidedly uncomfortable, like he might wake up in the middle of the night to find her dissecting him to find out more.

“Your friends have arrived,” Nova Prime pointed out as the three bounty hunters were escorted into the room, Pooch being supported by Cougar but still managing to to walk mostly under his own steam. Xandarian medical technology really was advanced if they’d treated Pooch’s injuries that quickly. She then adopted a more formal tone of voice and announced, “On behalf of the Nova Corp, we’d like to profess our profound gratitude for your help in defeating Max and saving Xandar. If you’ll follow Denarian Dey, he has something to show you.”

“Thank you, Nova Prime.”

Dey led them back through the Nova Corp headquarters, explaining as they went that all of their criminal records had been expunged, so as long as they didn’t commit any more crimes, they were free people. Pooch especially was ecstatic at the news as it meant he could go home and see his wife, hopefully just before she gave birth as she was due any day now. Then they were shown out onto a landing bay and confronted with the sight of the Milano, looking in better condition than she ever had in the all the time Jake had piloted her.

“We retrieved her from the warehouse complex and fixed her up; gave her a thorough clean for good measure,” Dey told them, a small smile playing about his features. Jake was momentarily lost for words, but of course it didn’t last long.

“Wow. Thank you,” He said, the sincerity shining through in his voice.

“I have a family. They’re alive because of you,” Dey said simply, before gesturing for Jake and the others to head to their ship.

Once they were out in space again, Pooch put the ship on autopilot and then came to join the rest of the crew, where they were scattered around the communal area. Clay was cleaning his guns, Aisha was curled up with an old, battered paperback that Jake had once bought on a whim from a market stall, and Jake and Cougar had taken over the bench along one wall, Jake laid down with his head in Cougar’s lap.

“So where now?” Pooch asked, smiling. Jake was convinced that he hadn’t stopped smiling since he’d contacted Jolene to tell her the good news, but no-one could blame him.

“Well, we’ve got a pregnant woman to visit, and then a baby to meet,” Clay said, “But after that…” He left the sentence hanging, the implication that they had nothing that they had to do clear. Jake shifted slightly, and then sat up, drawing everyone’s attention before he announced, “I want to go back to Terra. Given what Nova Prime told me, there’s someone I need to see.” He paused, glancing sideways at Cougar, and then dropped the bombshell he’d been thinking about since Nova Prime had told him that the genetic modification had been performed before he’d been born.

“I have a twin sister.”

**Author's Note:**

> Jensen = Captain America but with elements of Star-Lord  
> Aisha = Gamora  
> Roque = Heimdall  
> Clay, Cougar, and Pooch are vaguely based on Drax, Groot, and Rocket
> 
> Jess is totally Earth’s Captain America and was one of the founding members of the Avengers. If anyone gets the inspiration to write about her, or anything else in this universe I'd love to see it!


End file.
